Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 39 Weeks

Dear little baby,

I’m not sure if it is you or my body, but this past week, has been such a tease. I’ve been having contractions on a regular basis, but nothing consistent. They’ll appear for 30-60 minutes and then disappear for a couple of hours and then decide to show up again and then go away. Mentally it is draining as I think–oh maybe this is it–and then am deflated. I’m trying not to analyze every potential sign, but man it is hard not to.

I’ve also been praying to help relinquish control and just let you do your thing and arrive when you are supposed to–it is easier said than done. Overall, the pelvic pressure has dissipated a bit–which kind of makes me feel like I’m moving in the opposite direction.

Otherwise the week was pretty low key. There were a few flair ups at work but for the most part it was fairly calm. On Friday, my boss officially took me off of all projects and is just having me work on some things for when I return from maternity. Sunday, we made a turkey and Grandma and Grandpa came over but I think that was about it.

I also had my weekly Dr. appointment. I have gained 21 lbs so far–not to bad, and very surprising considering 10 of those lbs were put on in the first trimester. Everything else looks good. Your heart rate was around 155–so a little on the higher side again. I was dilated to a 3+ and the cervix has continued to soften–all good signs. I had my membranes stripped and was given direction to walk, walk and walk so more. So we’ll see what I’m able to do being trapped inside with the cold weather and what I can do at work. We also talked a lot about induction and if we should do it this Friday or wait until my due date next Tuesday. I’m a little torn. I really want to go naturally and have that experience of not being induced, but I’m also anxious to meet you and am fearful of you being a really big baby and needing a C-section to deliver, just because I wanted to experience going into labor naturally. If we schedule Friday and get bumped we’ll have a really good chance of getting in on Tuesday. If we wait until Tuesday and get bumped, we’ll have to wait until Friday, 11 days from now. 11 Days seems unfathomable. I’m sure I would go before then but the idea of waiting another 11 days seems like torture. After talking to Daddy, the plan is to put our name down on the list for Tuesday and then check in on Thursday afternoon to see what the wait list is like for Friday and if the list is really long, I’ll put my name down knowing I won’t get in and should for sure be set for Tuesday. I feel good about this plan and feel more confident that I’ll go into labor on my own before next Tuesday.

Thats all for now–lets meet soon little one.

Love,

Mama

Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 38.5 Weeks Pregnancy Insomnia

Little babes,

These last couple weeks before your arrival are a silent killer. The anticipation of your arrival is so exciting but so difficult. The notion that you can theoretically come at any point over a 6 week time period is hard. You don’t want to plan anything in case–but you also don’t want to just sit around and wait and drive yourself crazy.

My mobility at this point is pretty difficult. Standing up, walking, sleeping, sitting–there is no good position at this point. Lots of noises are made in any kind of transition.

Then tonight, I’m dealing with one of my first bouts of pregnancy insomnia. Thankfully, I haven’t dealt with this much–but it stinks. I just can’t sleep and what’s worse is knowing how tired I’m going to be at work tomorrow. Anyways, thought I would take advantage of the quietness of the house to capture of the non-stop thoughts about your arrival running through my head.

The constant change in how I’m feeling is so difficult. At one point, I’m so uncomfortable and feel so much pressure that I feel like your arrival could happen at any second. Then a couple hours later or maybe a day–I feel nothing as in I could be pregnant for another 2-3 months.

I also realize that I’m only 38 weeks pregnant and that I’m being inpatient and don’t have a right (on behalf of all overdue pregnant ladies) to feel this way. As of right now, I’m about 90% convinced that you will not arrive on your own and I’ll need to be induced. And if I’m being honest with myself, I’m about 50% OK with that. I had a great experience when I was induced with Lexi and really really want Dr. G to deliver you. The other 50% of me really wants to have that experience of going into labor naturally. In my mind, there is something fairly exhilarating about the adrenal rush that would come with that. Does my water break, timing contractions, determining when to call Grandma, determining when to go to the hospital–the unknown of that just seems a little exciting to me.

At the Dr. appointment earlier this week, I told Dr. G, I want to be induced on my due date (March 3rd) if you haven’t arrived by then. I’m torn on if I want to really do that or not. Part of my just wants to meet you and be done with it, and the other part wants to give you a couple more days to come on your own schedule. If you haven’t arrived by Friday, then I would be OK being induced. Regardless, I think I’m going to be done with work by my due date. I have some vacation that needs to get used and think I just want to be done. I’m going to take next Friday off and go to MOA to walk as it has been disgustingly cold here out (like -15 degrees with wind chills of -30, yuck!!) and have a fun family day by taking Lexi on a ride or two and seeing Lego land.

Come out soon sweet baby. Mama wants to meet you.

Love,

Mama

PS. Your big sister is excited to meet you as well. We were snuggling in bed the other night and she turns to me and declares, ‘Mama, I share girafee with sister’ which is her absolute favorite thing in the world and don’t believe she has gone a night without girafee for over a year and a half. You’re already so loved!

Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 38 Weeks

Dear Baby,

I’m sorry, but no more photos ūüė¶ I took them, but hadn’t transferred them to the computer yet and you’re sister wiped them off my phone. I’m super bummed!

I’ve officially entered the mind games of pregnancy stage. After hearing I was 50% effaced and dilated to a 2 last week and a particularly challenging day with some contractions–I was convinced I wasn’t going to make it through this week. I felt like I could potentially go into labor at any moment.

However, the following day–I felt great and felt like I wouldn’t go for another couple of weeks. The games your mind plays on you are tricky! The most exciting thing that happened this week was that I made it! Walking out of work on Friday, I was just ecstatic. I felt so relieved to have made it and to know that the next two weeks shouldn’t involve a lot of heavy lifting on my behalf. ¬†Granted there is still a lot of work to do, but I shouldn’t have to work in the evenings and I feel like all but one of my projects can move forward without me and the knowledge has been transferred. Wahoo!!!

Sub-consciously, I am thinking about your arrival constantly. I’m over-analyzing every movement, pain ¬†and feeling running through my body and it is kind of driving me a little crazy. In my head, I feel like there are two situations in which you will arrive.

1. I’m going to be induced. I think this situation is top of mind because that’s what happened with Lexi.

2. You are going to come really really fast. Like my water is going to break and I’m instantly going to be tons of pain and we’re not going to be able to wait for Grandma to get here or drop Lexi off anywhere and we’re just going to have to speed to the hospital.

Realistically, I know that your arrival will be very different than either of these scenarios, but these are the two that rise to the top as I constantly think about your arrival.

I’m also back to feeling more strongly that you are a boy. I’m just dying to find out. I can’t wait to find out how our family is about to change.

I had my weekly Dr appointment today and things look good. I’m dialated to about a 2.5 and about 60% effaced-so little progress but not a ton. Your heart rate was between 130 and 135. Overall, movement has decreased in frequency but is much stronger and you like to stretch out a out. I continue to get random spouts of numbness in my legs–Dr. G. confirmed you are very very low, which would explain those zingers.

I’m ready for you any time little nugs! Come out and meet your family.

Love,

Mama

Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 37 Weeks

Dear Baby,

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You are officially full term, but I need you to continue to bake at the very least for the rest of the week! I feel like ‘The Belly’ or you got huge this week. I was wearing a sweatshirt and you looked massive under it–even Daddy commented on how the Belly looks bigger now than it ever did with Lexi. After looking at this week’s picture–I feel like I’m starting to get the basketball look and not so much the long round egg look.

I had my weekly Dr. appointment today and things are going really well. Your heart rate was between 130 and 135. I continue to have a ridiculous amount of of Braxton Hicks contractions–some of them are painful, but painful at the bottom of the belly so Dr. G thinks that is from my body preparing to deliver you–not any pre-labor signs. I’m dilated to a comfortable 2 cm and about 50% or more effaced–so the body is making progress.

I still feel good considering your about 7.5 lbs. and can come at any point. I’m sleeping pretty well–only have to get up once during the night to go to the bathroom and can fall back asleep, most of the time. Rolling over has become nearly impossible. I pretty much need to sit up to roll to the other side–and find myself holding onto the blankets to help pull myself up.

Your movements have changed dramatically over the past 2-3 weeks. Instead of kicks and rolls it is more of stretching and adjustments. Usually, I can identify your butt and legs–especially when they are stretching out and pushing on the top of my belly. Pelvic pressure has increased, most noticeably when I’m walking but it is still bearable.

The only food that I really want to eat right now is sweets–and have had more than my fair share. So much so that I gained 3 lbs this week, yikes! Overall, I’ve had very little heartburn throughout the entire pregnancy and even when I have had it, it has been pretty minimal and haven’t needed to take TUMS, definitely thankful on that side of things. I think my feet/legs are starting to swell a little or at least by the end of the day, my socks feel tight around my legs. I also feel like I’ve reached the point where my maternity pants are getting small and my shirts are too short.

Work continues to be insane–but I just need to make it to the end of this week and it should level out as I’ll have some replacements on site. ¬†The end is in sight and I couldn’t be more excited!

Love,

Mama

Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 36 Weeks

Little Babes,

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We officially have 4 weeks or less until we meet face to face and I couldn’t be more excited. Will you have chunky little cheeks? Hair? A light complexion like mom? Or dark like Dad? Will you be tall like your sister? When will you arrive, how will you arrive? And of course will we be blessed with a son or a daughter? All of these questions are constantly running through my mind, mostly about when and how you will arrive, but the anticipation is exciting! And more than anything, we pray that you are a healthy little nugget!

This morning we had your 36 week check up. It started with an ultrasound to check on your growth and ensure you were in fact head down. As of today, you’re measuring to be right around 7 lbs.¬†with a heart rate between 135 and 145. The blood flow to your heart looks great and everything with your brain appears to be developing well. You are head down and like to keep your arms next to your face, but did cooperate and move them so we could get a little sneak peak of your chunky cheeks–and from the 3D pics, they look chunky! We were also able to see some hair on that head of yours.

Daddy and Lexi both came to the appointment this morning. Daddy was once again amazed at how much we’re able to look at with an ultra-sound and see you squirming around in there. Lexi, was a little less impressed. She knew right away that there was a baby on the screen, but was more interested in what the technician was doing to my belly and wanted to show the technician her belly.

After the ultra-sound we met with Dr. G and she did a quick test for Group B Strep and checked to see how things were progressing. I am dilated to 1 cm, and softening is starting to occur. This surprised me; I’m feeling pretty good and thought I would need to be more uncomfortable like I was with Lexi for any progression to begin. We also talked about how I likely won’t go past my due date if you haven’t arrived by then. Based on your current estimated size and typical growth patters, you would be 9 1/2 lbs! However, Lexi measured a little larger than you did at this same point, and ended up weighing 8 lbs when born so I still think it is all a guessing game at this point, BUT it does feel good to have an official ‘meet’ date in sight.

For whatever reason, this appointment made it feel a little more real for me in the fact that your Daddy and I will be meeting you soon. I still think we have several weeks, but it made me feel the pressure to get some things unloaded off my plate at work in case you do surprise us.

Outside of the Dr. appointment, things are going as expected. In general, I feel so much better than I did with Lexi at this point. I don’t have the itching–which is making sleep much better. I don’t have the pelvic pressure I did with her or the hip pain and feel less anxious for your arrival. There was so much unknown with her and I had never gone through labor or birth and I was constantly thinking about it. This time, I feel like I have a better idea what to expect–but still trying to embrace myself for a completely different experience. I’m also putting less pressure on myself to have everything at home be perfect. I’m not worried about what is in the hospital bag or forgetting something, or even having the car seat in the car. We only live 5 miles from the hospital, which is 1/4 of a mile away from Target–if we forget something, Daddy can easily go get something.

Work continues to be stressful as there is just so much going on and nobody to back me up at this point if you arrive. Additionally, it is just exhausting running from meetings all day and then coming home, making dinner, playing with Lexi, getting her ready for bed and then working for another several hours every night. There is no time to relax at all and just rest.

Until next week…

Love,

Mama

Uncategorized

Baby #2 #35 Weeks

Dear Baby,

IMG_4537¬†Ahh…. 35 Weeks. The milestone of ’35 weeks down and 35 days to go’. 35 days seems like nothing, but 5 weeks still feels like a ways away. At home, I’m feeling like I don’t have a whole lot to do to prep for your arrival. Your room is ready, I have diapers and wipes, nursing stuff ready and he fabric shells of all of your gear is washed. The three things I have left to do include: getting a hospital bag packed, buying an outfit to bring you home in and buckling the car seat base into the car. This is miles ahead of where we were with Lexi considering we hadn’t even had a shower at this point.

What I’m not ready for is stepping away from work and all of the things that come with a having a newborn. I’m ready to have a break from the craziness of work and just be at home with our family, but there is so much going on that only I am aware of and need to start to mind dump my projects onto others so things don’t fall apart when I leave. I’m also slightly disappointed to be leaving as I feel like there are a couple of projects I’ve been working on for the past 6 months that are finally starting to make headway and now I’m going to have to step away and wont’ be able to close the loop on everything. This is such a different mindset than I had with Lexi and honestly surprises me. I’ve never been so engaged and passionate about a job before. I’ve always been passionate about doing a good job, but haven’t been attached to what I’ve been doing. I can already tell that it will make going back to work so much easier than with Lexi.

I’m also not prepared for life with a newborn. Lexi was so easy on us, but I know I can’t expect that you will be like that and almost feel very naive of what to expect. I’m not ready to have lots of sleepless nights and wake up at 5-6 am everyday for the next 6+ years. I’m not ready for the amount of time I will need to spend with you and how that will change my relationship with Lexi. The other thing I don’t feel prepared for is the amount of love I will have for you. It is so hard to understand and believe that I could love another little babe as much as I love your sister.

The pain I was feeling last week when I walked or stood on one foot has gone away, and been replaced with the pregnancy waddle and a non-stop need to go to the bathroom. I constantly feel like I need to go, and that if I don’t go I may have an accident. This could also be a result of drinking more water, but I think it has a lot to do with you just getting bigger. I also subconsciously groan when I stand up and need a little assistance by pushing off on my own legs or holding onto something when I get up from the floor. I also have a hard time going up stairs while holding Lexi.

Sleep is getting more difficult. I have a harder time staying asleep and mobility is limited. The thought of rolling over is comparable to the idea of running a marathon–terrifying! In general, I have very littler energy. I’m working hard to try and not let that effect Lexi and have her watch TV every night after work, even though that’s what I want to do.

I’m looking forward to next week when we have another ultra-sound and get a better progress update on how things are going. 36 weeks feels like a big mental milestone.

Love,

Mama

Baby 2, Pregnancy Updates

Baby #2 34 Weeks

Dear Baby,

IMG_4533

The bump continues to get bigger every week. I have a couple of defined stretch marks to the left of my belly button and it looks alike a couple developing on the right side. There are 3-4 lines on each side and make about 2 inches long. My belly button still remains an ‘innie’ although it is starting to appear flatter.

This past week was interesting. On Sunday, Daddy and I went to a movie for one of the first times in over a year. It was such a nice treat to 1.) see a movie and 2.) see it in a theater. Grandma B and Papa watched Lexi and after, Lexi and I sat in the hot tub. Papa was nice enough to turn the temp down so it was safe for me to go in. While I was in there, it felt great, but almost immediately after, I felt more pelvic pressure and a little pain every time I would put pressure onto a foot.

This pain continued throughout the week and had me a little concerned. Did my water break or get a really small leak? What was making me feel so crappy? Then on Tuesday, I had a couple of real, painful contractions, which had me very concerned. There were only a couple so I’ve coupled it up against dehydration and just trying to do too much. Mental note to myself that nothing at work is worth having you arrive early or put onto bed rest. Must take better care of myself.

Overall, work continues to be absolutely insane. Being down two-and-a-half people on our team of 4 is a killer. I’m working ~15 hours a day and working on a project that is pretty complex and brand new to me, so I’m a little worried I may be missing something or with the aggressive timelines may not meet the deadline. Hoping that everything falls into place and things settle down in the next two weeks when our new team members start.

Other updates around you: sleep continues to be pretty good. I wake up around 4 to go to the bathroom. Just not feeling like I’m getting enough sleep. Your movement continues to be aggressive. Lots of stretching, hiccups and kicking of my internal organs verses the outside.

At the doctor’s appointment this morning, your heartbeat was the lowest it has ever been, 133–which has me leaning on the boy side of the gender again. The doctor also thought you were sleeping which may explain the lower heart rate. Everything else seems to be going well. I did have her check me to make sure you hadn’t dropped or any kind of progression had been made and she confirmed that everything looks as it should for 34 weeks. Weight gain is at 17 lbs.

I think that is it for now.

Love, Mama